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91
Survivor Room / Re: Good things about yourself
« Last post by Theres always light on April 18, 2020, 10:57:42 AM »
(this is a really good idea and a good place to have it  :))

I care
I don't give up on people
I have hope
I am dependable
I try to help
I try to see the good in things
I am supportive
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Survivor Room / Re: Losing it, our mental health emergency
« Last post by bluebell.x on April 02, 2020, 03:02:18 PM »
started watching it and it's really good but wouldn't suggest watching the second episode because it is verryyyy triggering
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Survivor Room / Re: Uncertainty with my future MH care.
« Last post by Tucan on April 01, 2020, 06:21:43 PM »
Hey how are you today?
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Survivor Room / Re: Aspergers / High functioning autism assessment
« Last post by Vermilion on April 01, 2020, 12:19:17 AM »
Ah, I see what you mean now, the very time time I should take something literally..! I think I can understand that itwould be easier than talking to people directly but I worry that would come off as rude to some people? My brain tends to over think things like this though, often to the point where I get it completely wrong! Thinking about it, my lack of eye contact and mumbling probably comes off as a bit rude too. The important thing is that it helped you. It seems that you were lucky enough to find a workplace where you were able to do that, work really does help people in so many ways. I often learn by imitation, watching how others react to situations.
Anywho, I guess that work is a huge boost for self confidence as well as general life skills and being out of work could have a negative effect on them. Again, it's about that balance that you seem to have gotten the hang of better than I have.

On a side note- when I'm at the supermarket I find the 'scan as you go' really helpful; I can check prices of things without asking staff, I can already see what the bill will be before I go to pay (my maths skills are appalling) and I can put everything into the bags as I'm going atound which means that I don't get in a flap at the checkouts. Then I just scan the barcode, pay via card & go home. Zero human interaction providing other customers leave me alone.

I seem to babbling again, apologies if I have.
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Survivor Room / Re: Aspergers / High functioning autism assessment
« Last post by Lorien on March 31, 2020, 11:49:37 PM »
That wasn't what I meant. I meant I can literally do more at work than I can at home. I used find it impossible to go into shops, but slowly through work I built up strategies to help me to be able to do it. I could talk to people I knew but not people I didn't so I talked to the person I was working with instead - like "we need to wait for the receipt" rather than telling the cashier we'd like one etc. It took about 5 years before I got to the point I could just walk into a 'local/metro' sized shop. These days I can do a supermarket when it's not busy - with tinted lenses, a full list, music on, self service and payment by card. But I can do it. I don't think I would have learnt the same things in other ways. A CBT guy once advocated for pretty much full on exposure - but also pointless things. "Go stand in the supermarket for 10 mins, then you can leave" his theory was I'd see it wasn't scary - the effect was to prove it was too much.
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Survivor Room / Re: Aspergers / High functioning autism assessment
« Last post by Vermilion on March 31, 2020, 11:26:53 PM »
A lot of it depends on the work environment I think, I've been very unfortunate in that regard. Noisy, chaotic hours etc. I hope to do some more work with Occy health in the future to figure out the best thing to do. I think that there are huge benefits to working with the routine and structure etc but there's also the knowledge that I'd be doing something useful and contributing as best I can. However, I can never seem to get the right balance of pushing myself slightly and trying to do too much, I really hope that professionals will have some insight. I do worry about the length of time it could take but it's pointless to force myself to go back to working too soon and undo the hard work I've done with professionals. It's hard but I've learned that sometimes it's better to listen to the professionals who know what they're talking about.
I suppose that when others are autistic there is a lot more understanding, there will be others there that understand things like sensory issues and 'stimming' type behaviour. I noticed that when I attended a post dx group although it was still a struggle.

Quote
. Ive also found that I am more able to do things with/for other people than I am for myself.
I was actually trying to get over this exact problem with my old CC. For me I feel like my 'issues' are non existent or don't matter, likely because I was perceived as being naughty/disobedient etc as a child and when I got older I was seen as stubborn/making excuses etc. This was because of a late dx and no-one was aware that I was genuinely struggling, not even I was aware. I guess it's hard to break out of these ideas that have been drummed into us for our entire life so far.

That turned into quite a ramble!  :blushing1:
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Survivor Room / Re: Uncertainty with my future MH care.
« Last post by Vermilion on March 31, 2020, 11:06:50 PM »
They already have that in place but aren't enforcing it, it's so stupid. I'm less angry now. People just p** me off sometimes, I feel like they're making things worse than they really need to be. They all go out to panic buy and self isolate and then do the stupid things that I've mentioned above... humans are baffling.

I'm struggling a bit this evening, it's not because of earlier but I can't quite explain what it is. I've also got a medical issue that I might have to speak to the doctor about which is unlikely to happen because of lockdown. It's not an
emergency but it's really bothering me. Oh well, I'll just have to hope that it goes away.

I dunno, perhaps I'm just having a bad day.  I only hope that tomorrow is a better day than today was.  :(  :mf_sleep11:
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Survivor Room / Re: Uncertainty with my future MH care.
« Last post by icicle on March 31, 2020, 06:28:33 PM »
These are difficult times shopping wise. The shop I used today had people queuing 2 metres apart and it was one out, one in, with a one way system. There were also markings on the floor to keep people apart in the isles and barriers and a couple of people managing the checkouts, so no one had to queue near to each other. It was pretty well stocked, even had a stocked loo roll isle. Perhaps your local stores will implement something similar soon? The post office also had lines on the floor to keep people queuing 2 metres apart.
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Survivor Room / Re: Uncertainty with my future MH care.
« Last post by Vermilion on March 31, 2020, 05:35:24 PM »
 :ranting11: :ranting11: :banghead:

Got overwhelmed trying to get some shopping in. What's the point in me trying to distance myself when people make stupid small talk or stand right in the middle of the aisle chatting so that you can't get near things? Plus, everything has moved around since I was last there and so couldn't find things and a lot of things they didn't have in stock anyway. Then some t*** barged into me and complained that I was carrying a mop and he's lucky I didn't shove it up his arse, and I told him so. Tosser should've looked where he was going. I seriously feel like I'm about to cry. People are such arseholes.  :>:(: Anything I couldn't get today I'll do without, I'm not going through that crap again. I was doing ok but then people go and f*** up mood! Carrying everything home was really hard and now both shoulders hurt, it wouldn't have been as bad if I could drive but my brain won't let me. My brain is yelling at me, telling me how stupid I am and I kinda feel that way to be honest.
I don't think that I'll hurt myself but I am thinking of it. I accidentally bashed the b**n and I'm glad. My brain makes things so much worse than they need to be. I am pissed right off both with myself and others.

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Survivor Room / Re: Aspergers / High functioning autism assessment
« Last post by Lorien on March 31, 2020, 03:02:10 PM »
I've always done better when I've been working - I think it is that there is a level of external routine and because of the jobs I've had, a level of not wanting to impact on the care of other people. It is very difficult to get the right balance, I'm still not there with that, but at times when I've been off, the longer it was the more I spiralled.

But I have always worked with autistic people even before I had any idea that I am autistic. That tends to make the environment at work much easier. Ive also found that I am more able to do things with/for other people than I am for myself.
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