SH becoming less satisfying, need to harm more or else experience stress buildup

[LookingLost]

Um, hi, this is my first post here, just thought i'd give it a go...

Self Harm for me has become less satisfying, and, like with drugs, I feel like i've builtup a tolerance and I have to make more cuts/in general harm more, to get anything near the same release. The problem is that I've run out of clear skin and find it more difficult to SH over old scars.

Has anyone else had this problem? Or any ideas/suggestions that might help?

Thanks for reading.

[Rob]

Hey  :wave:

Welcome to the forum. It can be something that some people seem to build up a tolerance with, but alternatively, you could try and work on reducing the incidence of SH - if you can do that, the effects when you do sh will seem greater, which would be a win-win situation?

[LookingLost]

Okay. I have been trying to reduce the frequency of my SH, and it hasn't worked that way so far, but i'll keep at it.

Thanks for reading and replying.

[Donthurtme]

I had this issue. I found an alternative that was actually extremely beneficial, although it depends why you SH as to whether this would work for you.

I SH to punish myself and at some point I decided that cutting wasn't punishment enough so I had to make myself do something that I was extrememly uncomfortable with (I have social issues, so things like talking to people or going out in public) and built up a tolerance so had to do more, which just resulted in me becoming more socially adept. I'll admit that it isn't the best thing in the world because some of the things I did to punish myself were unsafe, but in a lot of ways it helped.

Perhaps if it is for release you could do something that releases adrenaline? Like maybe exercise and really push yourself? It depends a lot on your circumstance and what would be most appropriate to that...

[LookingLost]

That's a really interesting idea, and i'm glad it worked so well for you.

I self harm for many reasons: To punish myself, to comfort myself, to release stress/tension/negative feelings, to cope with anxiety and sensory overload, to prove i'm alive, to feel something/stop the numbness, to distance myself from life, to have control, to stay alive.

The only problem with your idea is that, if I were to punish myself by forcing myself into social situations, I would most likely then feel the need to SH to comfort myself, release stress, cope with anxiety and sensory overload. 

Thankyou for the suggestion though, i'll try to think of something suitable along those lines... 

[riot-grrrl]

Hey, :wave: 

welcome to the forum :-) I really hope that you find it helpfull here and make some friends. Everyone here is really lovely and so supportive so i'm sure you'll do fine!

I've been self harming for eleven years now and like you i've felt at times that it wasn't enough and i wasn't getting the same effects anymore and felt that i needed to do worse to myself. As you said, with drugs the same can apply, you end up needing to do more and more to get high or get any effect.. i've had this problem too.

I think as the others have said if you can try to reduce the incidences of sh it would help. I know thats a difficult task in and of itself though! For me one thing that helped was to get a very difficult, occasionally rather painfull but super enjoyable hobby... pole dancing! I also need to show skin for this, so many reasons there not to sh, and when i feel like harming i can go on the pole and exercise untill im shattered and my thighs are bruised! lol. But i also feel fantastic. It's increased my confidance, happiness, i've made new friends... a whole new lease on life! There are loads of hobbies you could do: yoga, pilates, zumba, gymnstics, swimming, tennis, jogging, gym work in general, dancing, ice skating... something demnding but enjoyable is great in my opinion.

Are you getting any professional support at the minuet hun? it might be worth looking into if your not? xx

[LookingLost]

Hi.   :hellokitty:

Thankyou. Everyone here does seem lovely, this is possibly the friendliest forum i've been on. 

I'm sorry to hear that you've been self-harming for so long, and i'm really glad you found an alternative, and healthier, activity, well done you.  I've tried things like running and swimming (which failed, me being a smoker), but i'm trying to lose weight right now, then I think i'll try again, 'cause i'd really like to do something like that, and I guess you don't get better at it unless you try really hard.

Thanks a lot for the ideas.  :thumbsup:

Yeah, I see a psychologist, a psychiatrist, key-worker and OT. Do you see anyone? (If you don't mind me asking)

P.S. Are you a Hole fan? 

[riot-grrrl]

This is also the friendliest forum i've ever been on, which is why i've hung around so long!!

Yeah I am a Hole fan! :-)  I love rock / metal music. How about you?

I'm a smoker too so can relate with that making exercise harder, I tried to give jogging a go but I couldn't cope. Though I keep threatening to try again!

Recently i've been doing pretty good, so i'm not actually engaged with services now except for my GP who writes my prescriptions. I am on a 6 month waiting list for DBT but might not take it up, i'm still trying to decide. Its hard because my moods can go up and down so quickly, I can be fine one week and a mess the next.

How helpfull do you find the professionals? Do you have any family or friends that you trust enough to talk to? I think it helps a lot to have a good support network xxx

[LookingLost]

I'm really into rock, but don't have much experience of metal. I hardly ever meet other Hole fans, so this is cool.  :happycat:

If you do try again, good luck!

I'm glad that you've been doing pretty good, I hope it stays that way. Also, it says in your signature that you haven't self-harmed for a really long time- that's really great. Um, i'm not sure if my ups and downs are the same as yours, but generally i'm at what I call 'my baseline level of depression', which is around a 2 out of 10 on a scale, then other times, my mood will drop for some reason (sometimes what feels like no reason), until i'm at a 0 or 1 out of 10.

I find the professionals helpful in some respects. It's good to have someone friendly and understanding to talk to, some of them prescribe medication, they can liaise with other organisations for me, when I don't have the confidence to. Also, I find talking to my psychologist helpful because she can help me understand things about having Asperger's syndrome. They have helped me a lot, and they are some of the nicest people I have met, but I don't know whether they can actually help make me better. I wouldn't expect them to though, there's only so much they can do, I guess, and i'm grateful for what they have done. I don't understand it when they tell me they think i'm doing better when i'm not, though.  Do you find them helpful?

I have a friend who is also a patient that I can talk to about most things, because it often turns out that he's experienced it too. What about you?