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Author Topic: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*  (Read 23077 times)

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Offline catapult

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #10 on: January 02, 2012, 06:31:48 PM »
 lock please
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Offline catapult

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #11 on: January 06, 2012, 07:43:25 PM »
Please lock this i cant settle knowing its open. Thankyou. lock please lock please lock please

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Offline catapult

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2012, 12:42:08 PM »
Considering this is still open i thought i might aswell have a waffle. Had my back to work meeting this morning, it went well. I waffled. Im having a waffle day. Im going back Feb 1st. Am quite lookin forward to it actually, itll be nice to be busy again, and be around people. Im going back on my old unit. I work at my local hospital, im a top cleaner  ;D I work on Intensive Care. The staff are lovely and its closed off from the rest of the hospital so its like a little community. Hopefully being back will inspire me to complete the rest of my course. Ive been half way thru a diploma in Human Anatomy & Physiology for like, 3 years now. Longest diploma ever!!!

Im hoping life is onwards & upwards from here on it. Im no longer in therapy, im going back to work, my meds are stabilised, im learning a little more everyday about my bpd and how it affects me. I can self sooth now, i can be kind, and nice to myself. I eat well and sleep okay. I had one lapse of drinking in 8 months, and havnt self harmed since last October. Im re-building my relationships with my family, and making new freinds. I have new hobbies & interests, and my divorce is nearly over after 19 months.

Above all this, ive embraced life. I made a decision. I will never attempt to take my own life again. I will never do anything intentionally, that will land me in hospital. I will no longer be cruel, or evil to myself. I will no more cause myself uneccessary pain or suffering. I will not torture myself with the things i have lost, but look to the things i have, and can gain. I will live my life.

Wow, that was profound!!! Bring on the silliness!!!!!!! nuhnuh :raspberry: :hyper: :yahooo:
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Offline Lily Kym

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #13 on: January 10, 2012, 02:00:57 PM »
 :rose: GOOD FOR YOU!
Sounds very positive xx xx xx xx
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Offline Broken Wings

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #14 on: January 10, 2012, 06:47:04 PM »
So good to hear you sound so postive you go hun woohoo  respect :hug1: :hug2:xx
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Offline catapult

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #15 on: January 11, 2012, 02:57:25 PM »
Thanks guys, i am, feeling very positive. With life, comes problems, but as each one comes along im dealing with it much better. Have to go to docs in morning, i can barely walk coz my legs are so bad. Was supposed to go today but i kinda know what theyre gonna say anyway. An if ive got stress fractures then they migh make me use crutches. NOT GOOD! I have too much to do these days to be laid up. Ive got a lfie to live dammit! Typical, i get a lust for it an get injured an get told to sit on my ass for weeks on end. Booooooo!

So, after being scolded today by B, am gonna call the docs in the morn an get me pins checked oot. I wont hear the end of it if i dont!

Other than that ive had an orite day, hobbled into town, paid some bills, got some food in so i have something else for tea other than toast, whoop! Been kinda naughty tho an spent my sky bill money on new headphones  :doh: That i need for running, that i cant do, coz i can barely walk, but it made sense at the time! They were on sale so wanted to get them while they were cheap. Ooh an i might be getting a dog, temporarily. My sister unfortunatley is going to be splitting with her partner so needs a dog sitter while the war rages. So gonna have a crazy pound pup eating my house at some point in the not too distant future. At least i can help out in some way. One of the most difficult things about going thru my own divorce was not having anyone to help. But enough of that, i feel okay, so thats it for now  :)
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Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees.

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Offline Broken Wings

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #16 on: January 11, 2012, 07:04:13 PM »
Good to hear you still so postive i hope your poor legs will be ok,its a b***** when you start to get your life on track then a physical thing will come along and bite you on the bum.Take care hun your so worth it  :hug1: :hug2:xx
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Offline catapult

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #17 on: January 11, 2012, 07:08:48 PM »
So, i phones NHS Direct after a good'ol talking to, and it turns out i am suffering from stress fractures in the tibia of both legs. I just posted in the poorly room, like i ran that hard, ive managed to break my own legs. This is some hardcore stuff here!!! Have to go see gp in morning an they might be offing me to trauma to pick up some crutches.

Oh my giddy aunt. Its a floomin good job i have an amazing sense of humour or id be sitting in a big bucket of sulking right now. As it turns out im just wallowing in self pity instead  ;D

So im BANNED from running. Now that....has me more than just a little knarked. Stoopid stoopid stoopid meeeeeeee. But thats me all over, all or nothing. Ahh well, ill be sure to update once i get a beating off the doc 2moro for running on an injury and therefore making it WORSE.

One word, DOH!!!!!!

An thanks Ms boots, always thinking of you hun. Yeah, this is what we in my world like to call 'lifes comedy timing'. Well lifes a peach, and im gonna pip it!!  :hug2:
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Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees.

NHS Direct 0845 4647   Samaritans 08457 909090 - Text Sams 07725909090

Offline Broken Wings

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #18 on: January 11, 2012, 07:26:10 PM »
 :1059: hope you get on alright at docs and they don't ear bash you too much
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Offline Bea

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Re: Mentalisms. The raging war. *poss trigs*
« Reply #19 on: January 11, 2012, 07:51:59 PM »
Sorry we missed your request to lock this.  Are you ok with it still running? 
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