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To stay or go?

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mirrhi:
I don't know if I should still be here.  I don't offer much, I avoid so much that may trigger, I want too much but give too little.

I'm stupid stupid stupid.  But I'm doing ok.  Better than I was a while back anyway.  I never felt I deserved support then so how can I possibly now?  I know people must read my posts and think 'what the f*** is she whingeing about???' 

If I'm honest I do feel that things are getting better.  Slowly, steadily, bit by bit.  'Stuff' kicks up, sometimes more, sometimes less, but slowly slowly the 'less' becomes more if that makes any sense?  Or maybe I just deal with the 'more' better than before?

I still crave that outlet, that support, the thoughts and hugs as less becomes more, but to deserve that I must give.  But to give feels risky at the moment.

I don't know.  I guess I just want the lovely people here to know I want to give, I just don't know if I can.

catapult:
It sounds to me like youre doing well.

You want to give, thats a beautiful thing hunni. To give, when we, in our lives, have lost so much, shows such great strength, and character, you should be damn proud of that. You dont have to force it, maybe knowing is enough for now. An in a little time, mabe itll happen on its own  :)

Just wanted to give you some support, youre doin well hun, i know what you mean in some of the things youve said. Maybe the lows are still there, but maybe not as low as they once were.  An maybe it will get hard again, but now you have the knowledge that it is doable, that riding it out really does lead to getting past it, and feeling a little better.

 :hug2: hun x

catapult:
Oh, and to answer your question, definitley stay  :) Definitley x

mirrhi:
 :hug1: Catapult, that means so much, thank you  :hug1:

Lily Kym:

--- Quote from: mirrhi on December 04, 2011, 08:03:23 PM --- but to deserve that I must give. 
--- End quote ---
I'm sorry hun but i really disagree with that.

Everyone deserves support on here. No matter if they post on others threads or not.

I know i've not posted much on your threads but recently things have been a little hard - so i've not posted much on anyones.

I really really really hope you decide to stay - because we will miss you if you do go. xx xx xx

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