Author Topic: Parents are struggling to get by *No Money*  (Read 5077 times)

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Offline riot-grrrl

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Parents are struggling to get by *No Money*
« on: August 02, 2012, 02:24:13 PM »
My parents are really struggling to get by they have very very little money.

My dad who was the main wage earner was told to retire by his consultant after a very serious, in-operable heart attack in 2007.  He got incapacity benefit but now he is over 65 he only gets a crappy state pension and nothing else. No more incapacity or anything.

My mum works as much as she possibly can, but earns very little. It isn't enough to keep us going. I just found her looking through the odd bits of jewlerry her mother left her (nothing expensive, just very very sentimental), asking me should she sell it.

 I didn't realise how serious it was but we keep getting cut off because they can't afford to pay the bills. My dad is in denial and my mum cannot cope. They aren't even talking to each other anymore. My mum says my dad hates her and doesn't love her and hasn't for ages. She was in tears. My dad hides in his room all day.

I'm just feeling so helpless. I want to help them and i feel like there must be ways of helping them, there must be benefits they are entitled to surely? People cant live like this.

Does anyone have any ideas of what we can do? Or where I could go for advice / help?
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Offline Lily Kym

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Re: Parents are struggling to get by *No Money*
« Reply #1 on: August 02, 2012, 02:53:04 PM »
CAB hun. and you need to go asap
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Offline Lwona

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Re: Parents are struggling to get by *No Money*
« Reply #2 on: August 02, 2012, 03:03:14 PM »
Hey :hug1:

Sorry things are so difficult money wise at the moment. I would recommend visiting your local Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB), they were helpful for me.

Do you know why your Dad's Incapacity got stopped? It sounds to me like he should still be receiving that if he is medically not allowed to work. Again, CAB should have more advice on that and can help fill in forms etc.

Hope things improve quickly xx
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Offline Ellie

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Re: Parents are struggling to get by *No Money*
« Reply #3 on: August 02, 2012, 05:47:57 PM »
your dad should be able to get attendance allowance. Its the equivalent of DLA but for over 65's. There is also pension credit as well. There must other things they can claim.Tell  them to go to CAB and they'll help with the forms.
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Offline Bea

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Re: Parents are struggling to get by *No Money*
« Reply #4 on: August 02, 2012, 06:30:21 PM »
If your dad is poorly, then your mum should be able to claim Carers Allowance - it is when you look after someone for 35+ hours a week.

Definitely make them an appointment with CAB and get some financial advice, there are other benefits that may be available to them.


Hope you can get it sorted  :hug2:
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Offline Lauren

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Re: Parents are struggling to get by *No Money*
« Reply #5 on: August 03, 2012, 02:04:48 PM »
As Ellie has said, your Dad may be entitled to Attendance Allowance, at the lower rate if not the higher. It would also be worthwhile making an application for Pension Credit.

Does your Dad have carers coming in? If so, it may be that the local authority can do a financial assessment and part fund the care?

Do they own their property? Might an equity release scheme be an option?

Are they in debt? Credit cards etc, maybe they could see an insolvency practitioner to try and reduce their monthly repayments, maybe through an IVA?

Does your Mum pay income tax on her wages? It may be that she is entitled to a refund from HMRC?

The direct gov website has lots of information on it and links to all the forms you can download to make the claims.

:hug2:
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Offline riot-grrrl

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Re: Parents are struggling to get by *No Money*
« Reply #6 on: August 15, 2012, 12:55:24 PM »
Thank you to everyone who replied, I really appreciate it. It means so much to me that you are all here and so supportive  :hug2:

Your right the CAB would be a good place to start, I could go along with them to help them explain. It's just difficult as my dad tries to deny the problem by hiding bills etc from my mum. But then when our services get cut off we are alerted anyway.

He's also reluctant to admit that he is ill. He tries to pretend that he is fine, when he isn't. I think it is a way of protecting himself from the truth of how serious his heart attack was.

It's just very sad to see my parents go through this, they are such good people they don't deserve it. It makes me feel like a terrible daughter that i'm not able to support them and help them as they did me while I was growing up.
"No, I regret nothing, all I regret is having been born, dying is such a long tiresome business I always found."