Thank you Starry and Greenday
I *know* I need to talk to fella about this, as he's their dad and I willl aways respect his decision where the boys are concerned, I couldn't do otherwise. It's hard thought to raise the question, he knows about my SH but it's a topic that is avoided really. Probably by me more than him tbh. I just can't seem to manage to actually raise the subject in any way, although I could answer (with difficulty) if he asked. There's no way I could expect him to ask though, as he has no idea it's come up as an issue unless I tell him which I seem incapable of doing :frying pan:
You're right that it depends on the kids, they're both so different I feel really different about each of them knowing. Ironically I'm far less worried about littl'un knowing then the elder. I absolutely dread littl'un's questions/response etc cos he's v down to earth, confident, assured of his own self, and will just ask outright his questions and voice his opinions, but I'd sooooo much rather that than what I expect from eldest. Eldest is too familiar. I see him worrying about others, about what they think, about if he's upset them, worried them, disappointed them. I can see his distress at not being the best, the best according to his own assessment - i.e. making others happy. I'm so scared that if he learns about the concept of
*SH* he might see that as an option. He does
not deserve that.