Author Topic: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*  (Read 146 times)

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Offline Locococo92

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First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« on: July 04, 2019, 05:38:35 PM »
This is my first post, I've not been a member for very long/have read a couple of posts here and there which have helped.
I have been put on to Fluoxetine and have an assessment coming up. I haven't been on them for very long at all and don't expect miracles, (been about 2-3 weeks now). I am 27 years old and I have 3 children (4,2 and 1) I don't sleep well at all and have very vivid intrusive thoughts about SH/SUI. I cant get them to stop!!! I have SH before (about 2 weeks ago was the last time), I'm fighting the urge to do so, but its making me feel worse by not doing it! :( what can i do to stop the thoughts/help not to do it?! I cant help but wonder the only way to stop it is by doing it. I don't want my kids to see/wonder what these marks are.
I have an appointment booked with talk matters, anyone know what will happen? I also have another doctors booked but its in a weeks time. The health visitor is referring us for a family support worker too which sounds great. I'm worried if I self harm again they will take my kids off of me. I wish these tablets would kick in already D: :(
anyone able to help?   :102: :sign0085: :cry_hamster:

Offline Rob

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #1 on: July 04, 2019, 11:41:01 PM »
 :welcomeani1:

Welcome to the forum. Have you looked at the distractions here?  http://nshn.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=16069.0 and here http://www.nshn.co.uk/downloads/Distractions.pdf

You've taken a positive step by seeing your GP, and you need to see how things go with your meddies - remember that it can take a while to get the correct dosage for you, and even the most suitable anti-depressant - there might be  a bit of trial and error getting it right for you.

There is usually a reason why some people turn to self harm, so it's worthwhile trying to find out the reason behind it.
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Offline Locococo92

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #2 on: July 05, 2019, 07:13:46 AM »
I have taken a look and already have some in place but the thoughts are constantly there, i can deal with the SH thoughts, its the SUI that frighten me. The feeling of being worthless and my children being better off without me D:

Ive had several ADs in the past which hadnt helped then so my doctor feels they wont be useful to try now. I know there are others to try though.


Ive lost control in my life, its been building up since my son was born 2 years ago, but things have got too much from this year when i started to SH again.

Offline Rob

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #3 on: July 05, 2019, 02:16:54 PM »
It's not an uncommon thought train that you have, and there are ways of improving your feeling of self worth and confidence. Having three children must be demanding for you. Any idea when you'll hear from your family support officer?
:icon_arrow: NHS Direct 111 :icon_arrow: Careline 0808 100 1210 :icon_arrow: Childline 0800 1111 :icon_arrow: Samaritans 08457 909090 - Text SAMs 07725909090 - Free SAMs 116 123 :icon_arrow: Basic First Aid

Offline Locococo92

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #4 on: July 05, 2019, 06:31:16 PM »
The health visitor did the referral last week but she didnt say how long it would take. I went to the doctors today because i felt worse today and i am seeing the crisis team tomorrow afternoon.

Offline Rob

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #5 on: July 05, 2019, 06:40:33 PM »
You're doing the right things to get the right support to help you through things.  :)
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Offline Vermilion

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #6 on: July 05, 2019, 08:11:13 PM »
With meds/recovery it can seem a very slow, painstaking process but you are doing all the right things. I think you'll feel heaps better when you have some proper care in place.
I can't really add much to what Rob has already said but you have my support.  :hug1:
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Offline Locococo92

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #7 on: July 05, 2019, 10:37:53 PM »
Thanks. Feel a bit better tonight but I wont go into that.
I forgot how slow the ball starts to roll.. should have reached out months ago and worried i left it too late.

Offline Terri

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #8 on: July 05, 2019, 10:40:20 PM »
It's never too late. You can definitely come back from this - the important thing is that the ball is now rolling, and things will be put in place. I hope the crisis team are helpful tomorrow. Do you find it helps to write things down? We're here, too. :hug2:
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Offline justine

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Re: First post, not coping *trig SH/SI/SUI/GRAPHIC*
« Reply #9 on: July 06, 2019, 09:40:57 AM »
I'd recommend exercise. Its something you can do. Its a distraction to an extent and you can channel any anger at having those thoughts into the exercise. Plus you get a seratonin boost.
I've been on fluoxitine. Worked amazingly well for me, but took a while to start working.
If you feel like life is a dark, worthless place, please know that you have just fallen down a hole and that impossible as it seems, you can climb out again, and see that life is really a beautiful place to be

http://www.nshn.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=74073.msg1702918#new