Recent Posts

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Survivor Room / Re: DBT *brief mention of SH*
« Last post by Skye on April 23, 2019, 04:56:17 AM »
Well done yrangelion- nice post  :) :hug2:
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Survivor Room / Re: Acts of self kindness
« Last post by Skye on April 23, 2019, 04:54:04 AM »
Sleep is restorative isnít it?  :)

A hot drink, whilst a complete cliche  ::), also helps me sometimes.
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Survivor Room / Re: DBT *brief mention of SH*
« Last post by sniper on April 21, 2019, 06:28:03 AM »
I agree. DBT can be very useful. I've done it 3 times now and taken important skills from it. mostly the mindfulness and distraction skills are the ones that usually help.  just never when I need them to. but, yes very useful indeed. there is also a DBT app for a phone or tablet. its kinda like a diary and can help you keep track of practising the skills.
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Survivor Room / Re: Acts of self kindness
« Last post by Tigger on April 21, 2019, 04:27:20 AM »
Hey i struggle with this too. My best form of self care is a nap. I can chill and watch netflix etc but then i just feel guilty. All the traditional self care i struggle with a bit.
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Survivor Room / Re: DBT *brief mention of SH*
« Last post by yrangelion on April 20, 2019, 01:54:28 PM »
Thank you xx
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Survivor Room / Re: DBT *brief mention of SH*
« Last post by Tucan on April 20, 2019, 11:35:48 AM »
 :woohoo: well-done.
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Survivor Room / DBT *brief mention of SH*
« Last post by yrangelion on April 19, 2019, 10:07:40 PM »
Hi!
I've read the noticeboard post and I think this is the right place to post this...if not, please feel free to move mods! :)


DBT has changed my life. I have gone from SH'ing several times a day, to not SH'ing in nearly 2mths! It's not easy and it's a constant battle but my advice to anyone would be to give DBT your all, use the coaching line as much as needed, do the homework and really put the effort in. it is hard, really hard in fact and the first time I did it, I ended up coming out of the group after about 6mths because I couldn't do it, I completed the last 6mths on just a 1:1 basis which really isn't the same. I then went back into group for 6mths and they decided I was well enough to do it on my own then. I still get days where I struggle and have to phone the coaching line but overall I am doing ok. I mean the fact that I even phone the coaching line when struggling is a huge deal as before I was VERY anti-phoning.

I am even looking at going back to uni in September, this would have been unimaginable before DBT.

If you have any questions about DBT or about my journey, please feel free to ask them! :)

Stay strong guys and don't give up! xx
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Survivor Room / Re: Self harm and you - your stories. Part 2 *posts may trigger*
« Last post by Mihashi on April 05, 2019, 09:26:43 AM »
:trig: SH, SUI

I think I started Self-harming when I was around 9, as I said before. I really can't remember now since I'm in my mid 20s and it's just been so long, and I've been doing it on and off. It's always been as a form of punishment, though. The main reason for this is that, now looking back, my mother did physically and verbally abuse myself and my siblings, but once the 2nd child came, a lot less of it was toward me, so I felt that I needed to keep myself in check if things were going to be fair. Our house has been notoriously a loud and rather off-putting one due to how much screaming there is. I've never been a fan of it, but I'll be the last to say that abuse was anyone's intention at all. Things have gotten better since. For a long while, I thought that maybe it was a good idea to commit suicide at some point because, hey, all the kids in the neighborhood seemed to want me to anyway, and why not make them happy? The main reason why I still live is that the same voice telling me to harm myself gives a reminder that doing so would be an easy way out, and I wouldn't be living up to responsibility. I've also learned over the years that I like living, so both of those keep me going.

Over the years, it started off very simply, but like a constantly upgrading machine, I found more and more creative ways to do it. I'll get back to that later. The reasons for it always changed too, from guilt of hurting someone emotionally on accident, to letting people toy with me too much, to grades (they've about never been good, especially at the start of all this), to sometimes out of generally feeling that I'm worthless and therefore need punishment.

I've found 2 ways that this comes on.
1 - I can feel it coming like an oncoming train. Sometimes I can get rid of it before it arrives.
2 - There's this short, very short moment where I feel the imbalance in my head go wild. It happens between the incident itself, and my self-harm, whichever way it manifests.

I can't really pinpoint any patterns on what circumstances lead to either, though. What is a pattern though is what happens after. It seems all the emotions that I try to suppress (sadness, hope - strangely, mostly sadness though) come at me like a typhoon and I end up in tears within minutes.

I said I'd come back to the multiple ways that this manifested. Well, in the middle of a particularly rough patch, and nearly killed myself with a glass milk jug. My sister (number 2 mentioned previously) thankfully called emergency and it turned out that night that the majority of the injuries were on my hands and not head, and I got stitches in both of them.

I went to therapy for about a couple months after that, doing CBT. That helped me gain a more positive voice to drown out the one plaguing me for so many years. I also stopped loathing myself (I think I'm... okay. Not that great, but okay-ish). And for 2 or so years, that seemed to do the trick.

Until one time I managed to get the car stuck at the grocery store, upon which I had a flash of self-harm. Since then, it's been a somewhat gradual, but also exponentially faster spiral into more dangerous territory. A couple weeks ago, I'm sure I sprained my thumb harming it. I hadn't even noticed I hit there, where my focus was on a couple seemingly larger spots.

The thing here is that every time I start self-harming again, it comes back stronger. And the voice I developed in CBT has been crumbling, with the more rather negative voice coming back with "I don't care" with every rebuttal I give it. I've gotten again to the point where there's no actual reason for the self-harm as punishment, but it seems that in that moment, it's needed anyway. I'm terrified that what happened on the night with the milk jug will happen again, but far, far worse. Because I didn't even realize I might have died then until after getting stitches, I'm almost certain if it does happen again, that it'll be through a harder form that does kill me quicker.

I have a fiance right now, and for the month at least, I'll stick with him. He's very good to me, too good really. I have a lot of thoughts where I don't deserve something, but he truly is someone I don't.

So that's why I'm here. I'll probably edit this post here later because there's still more to add, but those are the details for now.
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Research Topics / Re: Body Modification and Self Harm
« Last post by Taryn on April 04, 2019, 07:29:24 PM »
Hi everyone,

Just a quick note to say that I am no longer recruiting to this study. I was very fortunate that a lot of people contacted me to say they were interested in taking part, so I have now completed interviews with enough people.

I have analysed the information and am in the process of writing up the study.

I will be writing a summary of the study too (without jargon!), and would be happy to post a copy here :)

Thank you for all the interest in my study.

Taryn
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Survivor Room / Re: Phone scam
« Last post by Rob on April 02, 2019, 04:42:02 PM »
First port of call is usually with your mobile provider - and as they've debited you for something that you haven't agreed to, they should refund you.
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