Author Topic: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*  (Read 312 times)

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Offline Emmz

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Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« on: March 31, 2018, 12:02:36 AM »
Iím due to start narrative exposure therapy on Thursday next week and am feeling triggered just thinking about it but canít not think about it.

I went to a&e after sh about a month ago and raised a safeguarding concern regarding my abuser. Now my cpn wants to try NET and I donít know what to expect.

I have really bad urges tonight and just canít stay grounded.

Has anyone else ever had this before?

Thanks,
Emmz x
Living is a problem because everybody dies

Offline Tigger

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #1 on: March 31, 2018, 10:59:27 AM »
I've done this before. First of all it is both the hardest thing I've ever done and the best thing I've ever done. You must be not at risk of current abuse for it to work.
Im not going to lie it was really hard, i had never told anybody before and i did find out quite a struggle. The shame was incredibly intense and i didn't know what shame was before but i could never have even begun to move on without having done it. It was extremely validating for me to hear the words "that was sexual abuse " and "its not your fault". I still struggle with accepting those words but i would be a lot worse of.

I found it easier to write it out and read it and i had homework everyday and i read it out for weeks until it became boring and my mind would wander elsewhere and that's when we stopped that therapy. To start with i could hardly get the words out and i would shake and sweat and feel like i was going to vomit. Make sure you jade safe plans after i would go home and sleep for a couple of hours after because i was drained and then have a nice activity with people planned for later so i could keep myself safe.
Outside I'm smiling, Inside I'm crying. Outside I'm laughing, Inside I'm dying.
"Its goodbye to the shortcuts, hello to the grind, no one ever said it would be an easy ride" - Relentless
Last SH 18/02/12

Offline Emmz

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2018, 05:41:13 AM »
 :maytrigger:
so, I have my narrative......

It was the hardest thing I have ever done. My CC wanted to not drag it out so we covered it in about 3 weeks.

I now am left feeling judged, ashamed and alone.
I feel I cannot shower as I feel too exposed, everything is reminding me of sex - it seems to be everywhere. My eating seems to be the only thing I can control apart from sh but I'm scared of going deeper than intended so can't even do that.

Distractions only last for so long and I'm at a point where I no longer want to distract - I want to destruct!

sorry if this is too much info.
Living is a problem because everybody dies

Online Tucan

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2018, 07:35:52 AM »
It sound difficult for you at the moment.
now hand over the tea bags and we won't have any trouble.... :police:


'Sigh no more ladies sigh no more for men were deceivers ever'

Offline Emmz

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2018, 11:12:59 PM »
Thank you for replying tucan,

I am really struggling this evening.

SH thoughts really strong and just want out.
Living is a problem because everybody dies

Online Tucan

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #5 on: April 21, 2018, 07:40:30 AM »
You have just done a really big and difficult thing. You are going to struggle emotionally afterwards. What can you do to be nice to yourself?
now hand over the tea bags and we won't have any trouble.... :police:


'Sigh no more ladies sigh no more for men were deceivers ever'

Offline Emmz

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #6 on: April 22, 2018, 12:08:08 AM »
I am feeling emotionally raw tonight and really suicidal.
I can't think of anything I can do to be nice to myself...?

I have to go back to my flat tomorrow where the gang r*** took place 5 years previous. I have to go to pack and sort out as I am finally moving. If I'm alive long enough to move?!

I can't do this I'm not cut out to cope with this
Living is a problem because everybody dies

Offline Tigger

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #7 on: April 22, 2018, 04:21:13 AM »
I'm a little worried for you i was told the point of the therapy was to do it until telling the story no longer provoked a reaction. I hope you still have professional support. Please be kind to yourself can do you have anybody who can support you while you are feeling so raw and triggered?
Outside I'm smiling, Inside I'm crying. Outside I'm laughing, Inside I'm dying.
"Its goodbye to the shortcuts, hello to the grind, no one ever said it would be an easy ride" - Relentless
Last SH 18/02/12

Offline Vermilion

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #8 on: April 22, 2018, 08:16:37 PM »
It would be s good idea to take someone to support you when you go back to the flat. You're bound to be struggling more at the moment. Try to see this as something positive in that you are moving on and putting it behind you. I know it's really hard though.  :hug2:
Frankly Autocorrect, I'm rather sick of your bull shirt.

Offline Emmz

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Re: Narrative Exposure Therapy *MT*
« Reply #9 on: April 23, 2018, 08:13:17 PM »
Thank you for your replies,

Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, my CPN, who did my NET with left friday.
I got a phonecall this afternoon from the AMHT saying that my CCO is x
I'm meeting her thursday.

I can't do this anymore!!!!
Living is a problem because everybody dies