Author Topic: Does your family know about your SH?  (Read 7261 times)

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Offline ebonytigger

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Does your family know about your SH?
« on: September 01, 2016, 10:01:00 AM »
Sorry if this is in the wrong place, not sure where to post it.

Does your family know about your SH and if so how did they react?

Offline indigo

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #1 on: September 12, 2016, 01:08:52 AM »
Hi ebonytigger. I have looked at this post probably about 3 times but have struggled to send a reply, as have struggled to think about my parents and my self harm together. My parents found out about me self harming when I was 19, a friend who was concerned about me told them. I have never really discussed the issue with them.
Am now 35, and still self harming. When I told my parents about my recent bout of depression, my mum mentioned my past s/h. I would feel uncomfortable about telling them about my most recent s/h.

Offline ebonytigger

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #2 on: September 12, 2016, 08:47:05 AM »
My mum was the only member of my family who found out a few years ago and she completely hit the roof about it. I ended up having no option but to kid her into thinking I'd accidentally done it while removing hair from my legs. Wasnt sure if  family exploding about it was something that happened to others here as well.

Offline Shinigami

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #3 on: September 12, 2016, 02:56:34 PM »
When my mum first found out, she basically exploded and I was dragged through family therapy, accusations of causing her a mental breakdown, blackmail and basically pure hatred for years. At the start, I would punish myself for it but then I realised that it was purely down to the fact she didn't understand SH. After I told her more about it and was able to explain that it wasn't her fault, she began to calm down a bit and after some time, was able to talk about it properly.
My dad, on the other hand, I willingly told him and he was okay about it, just curious as to why I had gravitated towards SH and if he could do anything to help.
Both of my parents have MH issues but my mum was also the only one to go loopy about it.
Nowadays, she must know I'm doing it again (some have been a bit obvious =\)but doesn't talk about it because she knows why and it's not her fault.

I do think that most of it stems from misunderstanding.

Do either of your parents now about it now??

Xx
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Offline ebonytigger

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #4 on: September 12, 2016, 08:52:48 PM »
Nope, I daren't tell Mum I started again after managing to stop. As for my father, he doesn't give a sh** about me or my brother so I don't see why I should tell him when me and my brother mean less than nothing to him.

Offline Vermilion

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #5 on: September 12, 2016, 09:50:45 PM »
My family know. They first found out when my mam accidentally saw them when I was getting out of the shower. It was a bit of a disaster because they didn't understand it. I won't go into details but their reactions just led me to be more discreet about the places on my body that I harmed. I was around 12 ish, maybe younger but it was somewhere around that age.
The second time they found out that I was SHing again was around 2 years ago when I was admitted to hospital and had no sleeves and later on one of the nurses decided to tell them that I'd also done it on the ward. Thankfully their reactions were a lot better because they understood about self harm and why people do it. I also think, as had already been said,  that it's often a lack of understanding that makes people freak out. Do you think that if your mam understood what self harm is and why people do it that she would have a better reaction this time? If not there is help out there via your GP or survivor organisations, there is a lot more help and understanding out there than there used to be.
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Offline Tucan

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #6 on: October 02, 2016, 05:20:15 PM »
They know I do it, but don't know details such as frequency, severity, methods etc. The worst of it is hidden from them. It took me 6 months to tell them I had ended up in a and e for around 24+ hours due to self harm.
now hand over the tea bags and we won't have any trouble.... :police:

Offline princess890

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #7 on: October 02, 2016, 08:59:04 PM »
i don't think they understand how bad i truly feel and the binge eating really affects me
4 Days Binge Free

Offline chuckles

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #8 on: October 02, 2016, 10:30:27 PM »
My family don't know anything about my SH tbh I think my mum would just shrug it off as it wasn't happening as she does with a lot of things and my dad I wouldn't even know how to start that conversation with him he would be devastated(daddy's girl) the only person close to me that knows off all the stuff I have gone through and my SH is my best friend
Im all alone,running scared
Losing my way in the dark
I tried to get up,stand on a prayer
But I keep crashing down hard
This is my side of the story only my side of the story Nobody cares,nobodys there no one will hear My side of the story

Offline Blue229

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Re: Does your family know about your SH?
« Reply #9 on: October 15, 2016, 10:58:09 PM »
No. I don't think it is any of their business and sadly I cannot trust them enough to confide in them about something so personal. The only people I have told are my wife, a few close friends I met through support groups and doctors/mental health professionals.