Author Topic: was my consultant psych in the wrong? BPD , SH. Unprofessional  (Read 4488 times)

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Offline belljar

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to cut a long story short i had a review with my consultent the other day and she caused me to leave in tears (ive been diagnosed with borderline personality dissorder) she started off stating that i had been in hospital with an OD since our last meeting to which i laughed nervously at and she asked "do i think thats finny?" I explained that i was just nervous and of course i didnt find it funny. she basically went through the interview saying that it was up to me to make changes, saying that if i said i was okay they would beloeve me and not help me but instead i needed to say what it was that i wanted to change. She argued that taking 2 pills and deciding against them wasnt good enough and gave me a smaller does to try... she said i needed to engage more with my doctors. We got to the point of food and she said that being too busy wasnt an excuse for not eating regularly despite that fact that i am very very busy. her whole demanor was rude and i felt like a 6 yr old being told off. Has anyone ever had this? Also I have reason to believe she was recording the meeting without consent...

Offline diamondwithaflaw

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Re: was my consultant psych in the wrong? BPD , SH. Unprofessional
« Reply #1 on: March 10, 2013, 04:22:40 AM »
Tough to know what to answer here. It sounds like a difficult review meeting and one that clearly left you very emotional, I hope you will feel easier about it very soon. I guess from what you've said here alone, and without having been at the meeting also, I don't think they were 'in the wrong' they've made some tough statements, and asked difficult questions that perhaps were direct but maybe need to be asked?
I guess if you've found taking your meds difficult and therefore none of you can see if they might work it would be natural to ask what you feel may be of benefit to you. It would be working on the theory of having some idea of what doesn't work leading to some idea of what might. Again, if you're telling them your ok it's going to make it difficult for them to help you, I guess in an ideal world they would read between the lines and see you're not ok but time constraints makes that more of a counselling/therapist role rather than consultant psychiatric, my guess is they want to make better use of their time with you?
Food, hmm sounds like you're trying hard to convince yourself there too? I would guess there's more to that than not having time to eat, without pushing into the issue here I think someone needs to explore how making time to eat would make you feel.
I think with BPD (and I have it too) its quite difficult to read things in the way in which they should have come across (in fact you may also feel cross or annoyed with my reply) and this sometimes makes us feel as though people are not trying to help. BPD is a tough one, there will be things that are tough to hear but you will get through the tough times you just need to be honest about your thoughts and feelings and be prepared to be challenged about them.
Good luck with your recovery, it's ok to feel anger all part of the process, I think it's great you've expressed you thoughts here :)

Offline Patient Pianist

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Re: was my consultant psych in the wrong? BPD , SH. Unprofessional
« Reply #2 on: March 10, 2013, 09:25:23 AM »
Hi

i'm sorry about the appointment you had left you feeling like that.  i had a similar experience to you the first time (and a few other times) i saw the psychiatrist i used to see.  i left the first appointment in tears, rang my psychologist and said i was never going back and how i'd been left feeling.  She spoke to the psychiatrist i'd seen about how i'd felt and why i'd found it difficult.  Psychiatrists i think do have a way of being direct and blunt i think because they are not psychologists or therapists and dont have the time regularly with you.  However i do think it's worth her knowing how the appointment left you feeling as it's not conducive to helping you.

As for potentially recording your session without consent that's not right so i would bring that up.  Maybe talk to your therapist if you feel more comfortable with them and they may be able to help you sort it out with the psychiatrist.

Keep talking.

Offline Lorien

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Re: was my consultant psych in the wrong? BPD , SH. Unprofessional
« Reply #3 on: March 10, 2013, 09:59:30 AM »
People do things accidentally sometimes, like leave a dictaphone out but not on. The psych I see does it very occasionally but I trust him not to do stuff behind my back.

From what you have said id say that they could have presented the things they said more professionally and considered the impact of what they were saying on you but the overall message is a familiar one.

I do think you should talk to them about it but I know I would find that very difficult myself, would you be able to write it?
“Dark times lie ahead of us and there will be a time when we must choose between what is easy and what is right.”

“It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

“Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”

Offline belljar

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Re: was my consultant psych in the wrong? BPD , SH. Unprofessional
« Reply #4 on: March 28, 2013, 12:15:14 AM »
thank you for all the replies on this post, i have had a tough time since especially with new medications etc ive tried to get over what my psych did and said and i feel better about it since talking to my GP and psychotherapist about her and neither seem to think she is very nice so at least i wasnt being over snsitive. Im just struggling now with what she has put me on and feeling like i am slipping whilst trying to hold myself together at work and around friends. Not so easy. thanks again

Offline Lorien

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Re: was my consultant psych in the wrong? BPD , SH. Unprofessional
« Reply #5 on: April 02, 2013, 09:21:42 AM »
Are the GP and therapist aware of how difficult things are for you at the moment.

Would you consider a different psych? If you really dont like this one?
“Dark times lie ahead of us and there will be a time when we must choose between what is easy and what is right.”

“It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

“Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”