bad thoughts *trig Sui*

[Terrier]

Hopefully just had a blip; know what you mean about long weekend being difficult.

Seems like you have a full day tomorrow, hopefully you will be able to get some of the support and help you need then.

Do you have any plans for the rest of today? 

 :doggy:

[terrified heart]

Thanks terrier, yeah hopefully just a blip xx

Haven't got any plans for rest of today. Might walk to local shop for a magazine and to get some air in a min. I did walk to another shop earlier but it was closed, sure the one in the opposite direction will be open tho.

Rest of the week looking better. Busy tomorrow, slimming world then work on Thurs, then work followed by meeting a friend on Fri. Haven't seen any of my friends for a while so trying to make more of an effort to do that.

Feel really lonely today. Lonely and lost. Oh and really sad. Tempted to go to bed, but want to try to get back into a routine again as I know I felt better when I did that.
Xx

[Terrier]

Know how you feel about being alone etc. Went for a walk myself earlier and that helped a bit, so think it might help if you do go to shop and get some air.

Try not to go to bed too early; be best if you could stick to your routine.

Take care.

 :doggy:

[jstcantstop]

 

[terrified heart]

Thanks both xx

I got out to the shop and it did help a bit. Broke up the long slow afternoon. Managed to stay out of bed until a reasonable hour and when I did go to bed I got to sleep early and slept all night.

Woke up this morning and didn't want to get out of bed. Felt tired and despondent. Had to be at my group for half ten and ended up getting up about 15mins before I had to leave. Was a bit of a rush, but made it on time. Group was hard. The content itself was fine (we were looking at negative thinking styles) but being with a group of people for two hours was hard. Found myself getting unnecessarily annoyed with people and found it hard to communicate. It has made me really worry about uni. Don't know if I'm going to cope with it. Feel like I'm going to mess it up.

Feel really down this afternoon. Easily irritated and low in mood. Had depot today, so hoping its because last dose was wearing off that I feel like this, and today's dose will pick me up again.

[jstcantstop]

I'm sorry group was hard. How long have you done it for?
I'm at uni so you can always pm me about it xxx

[Lily Kym]

Hey hun,
not really got any thing to offer, i'm sorry. thinking about you though

[terrified heart]

Thank you for replies and hugs xx

I've been going to the group for 3 weeks now. There are about 15-18 of us so it's not too bad. I was just really antisocial yesterday so struggled. I do feel better today, so hopefully the depot I had yesterday is having some effect and the last few days were just a blip.

I've been to uni before (a different one) and got my BSc. I coped really well then. I've been quite unwell last few years though, and been diagnosed with a different mental illness, and it's really knocked my confidence and abilities. I really want to do this MSc though, I really hope I cope with it.

Thanks again xx

[terrified heart]

Seem to have got through the blip now. Things much more positive. Been to group again and it went ok. I was much less irritable and managed to speak a few times.

Getting a bit worried about next week. I'm going to the south west to visit family. Will be staying with my auntie which will be ok, but will also be spending time with my dad which isn't always the best thing for me. I find my dad very hard work and seeing him always lowers my mood. We don't have the best relationship. I can cope with him for short periods, but I worry about seeing him over a week.

Haven't seen the psychologist for a while. I see him on a Monday and a couple of weeks ago it was a bank hol, then this week he was away. I'm seeing him next Mon. Need to talk to him about the worries around visiting my dad. Last time I saw the psychologist he gave me the names of some people who are high up in psychology who have mental illnesses. He gave me their websites to look up to give me hope that I also have a future. We are going to do a lot of work around recovery which will be good.

[angeldevil123]

just do not act on them terrified heart